When I'm 64 (I mean 5)

Darn it!   I'm too old  even to use the Beatles song as a title for my birthday blog posting.  The one we laughed about in 1967 when it was released because we would never, ever be that age.  Never.

How could this possibly happen?  I sometimes look at someone I know to be in her 50s and I think, yes, I'm old just like her.  And then I remember and realize that I am, indeed, a whole different kind of old.  And that realization sucks.

So, on my 65th birthday, here are 10 things I'm rather pissed about:

1. Medicare - really? How embarrassing.
2. I can’t drive at night and nobody needs me changing lanes at any time.
3. My feet hurt.
4. I have bruise that looks like Abraham Lincoln on my shin.  Just from barely hitting my leg while getting into the tub.  Joe says it might be Jesus, and that, if I can maintain it, perhaps I will become rich and famous.
5. I have the hands of a 100 year old farm worker.  I swear, my Aunt Madge, who is 97 and lives at Baptist Village in Waycross, is revolted by how old my hands look.
6. I have wrinkled everything. 
7. Eyebrows.  What eyebrows?
8. I can’t see in the dark or the light.  Joe and I went to an avant-garde play at the Actors Express and I was trying to get to the bathroom but ended up heading backstage, at which point Joe started hollering "Marcia! Marcia!  The other way!  The bathroom is the other way!"  I do believe some of the members of the audience thought I was part of the play.
9. Small print and mumblers.
10. Words and names.  I can't remember any of them. Especially under duress.

 But, come to think of it, the Beatles, just like the rest of us, did age.  Except for John and George, who never had the privilege.   Just like some of us.

Therefore, I guess I need to also include 10 things that are pretty rad about being 65.

1. Medicare - I'm happy to have it but I must say that I'm worried about my card.  It's just paper, no lamination.  What the hell?  I've had it just a couple of months (they send it early) and it's already looking worn.  I would laminate it myself but I'm afraid I'll be put in prison or something.  Old people's prison.  All the old people who laminated their Medicare cards.
2. My grown children and their children. Humans I hadn't met or even conjured up in my heart yet back in 1967.
3. Joe - what a surprise he was (and still is) to me, especially at my advanced age and level of disrepair.
4. Joe’s family - they're mostly Yankees but I'm able to overlook that.
5. Old friends who still love me and young friends who help me navigate this new world.
6. Teacher retirement.  One of the last things my daddy told me before he died was not to cash in my teacher retirement.  I didn't and now I'm very very very glad.
7. Only having to shave my legs about once a year.  My yearly shaving is when I noticed the bruise that looks like Abe/Jesus.
8. Enjoying Atlanta while most of the population is at work or school.  The Waffle House is much more relaxing without all the hungover weekenders. 
9. Old people's classes at Emory and the senior fares on Marta we learned about at the old people's classes at Emory.  I do have to add that old people can be really annoying.
10. Not having to worry about a tan.  Who would notice it through all the wrinkles?

 So, here's to 65, I guess.  From someone somewhat pissed but very happy to still be here.